


Illuminated

by Raewyll



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon universe with Rivamika flavour, F/M, Fun times with the Scouts, one of those ugh get a room stories
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:35:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25844416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raewyll/pseuds/Raewyll
Summary: Fully aware of the damage his squad can cause running amok, Levi goes to check on his soldiers while they are out drinking with the rest. Apparently, Mikasa is still holding onto grudges from times long past and the Captain too has some frustrations he needs to sort out. Things are bound to end up messy.[No spoilers mentioned. Safe to read even if you're only keeping up with the anime. Still, if you've read the manga, it will probably be easy to figure out where the story fits in the timeline.]
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman/Levi
Comments: 57
Kudos: 159





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is set about three years after the squad has completed its first mission with the Survey Corps, meaning that they have been working under Levi's command for a while now.

“You have to be kidding me,” Levi sighed, taking a deep breath before stepping into the canteen.

It was one of _those_ nights with drunken soldiers fighting, singing and crying – not necessarily in the same order.

He usually tried to avoid these gatherings but his squad was bound to be there, probably mixed up somewhere right in the middle of all that chaos and anarchy – and as Captain, causalities were bound to end up piling under _his_ name on the receipt.

“Armin,” he called, suddenly spotting a familiar tuft of blonde hair rounding the tables.

“Captain?” the boy asked, his eyes growing wide.

“How bad is it?” Levi asked, trying his best to appear uninterested and to keep his tone calm.

“It’s nothing major, I swear,” Armin replied, waving his hand a bit too excessively for someone who was supposed to be keeping things under control.

“Is that so?”

Armin gulped hard.

“I really hope so,” he noted, scratching the back of his head. “We made sure to keep Sasha well-fed, Eren’s not here so he can’t get into a fight with Jean and I’ve made sure to hide Connie’s money so he can’t lose it all at the Poker table.”

It was a long list and Armin had to keep counting onhis fingers to keep track. Maybe he too had slipped just a little and downed a few drinks here and there, but Levi couldn’t really blame him for that.

“Ah, yes,” Armin suddenly continued, “and Mikasa has been drinking a little.”

The Captain’s eyes narrowed.

“Mikasa has been drinking?”

Armin winced. “A little.”

That was new.

Besides, if it had been just a _little_ , it wouldn’t have given Armin cause for concern. According to Hange, Mikasa’s body was even quicker to neutralize harmful substances than his own, alcohol indlucded.

“Well then,” Levi concluded. “It’s time to check up on my squad.”

Armin simply nodded and motioned towards the table in the far left corner. “I will be right back.”

There was something else on his mind, Levi could tell.

He didn’t need to wait long to find out.

“And Captain,” Armin continued with a little bit of hesitation, “it might be a good idea to avoid Mikasa tonight...”

“And why is that?”

“Ah, well, I guess you will find out,” Armin stammered and quickly excused himself.

_Wonderful_ , Levi thought.

_Here goes nothing._

…

He expected the situation to be far worse.

He found most of his squad sitting quietly around the table, none of them really paying attention to the crowd raging all around.

“Captain,” Connie called, clearly surprised to see him.

He was surrounded by a group of new recruits, which ended up cutting him off from the rest of the table.

He seemed sober enough, so Levi decided to prod him a little for information.

“I heard Mikasa is having a rough night,” he noted in a casual tone.

“Ouch,” Connie winced. “Yeah, about that…”

Levi gave him a questioning look, tilting his head a little. “Is there something I should be aware of?”

“Well, the thing is,” Connie tried to explain but ended up short, “someone might have reminded her that she still owes you one for how you treated Eren back at the trials.”

That was a surprisingly coherent sentence.

“I guess,” he quickly added.

“Someone, you say?” Levi mused, trying to feign ignorance.

Connie seemed to be pondering his options but his thoughtful expression quickly turned into a wide grin. “She was going on about how much we owe you and such… It might’ve gotten someone over there a little bit jealous,” he explained, still grinning.

“Thank you, Connie,” Levi noted. “I will keep that in mind.”

He turned his sight towards the other end of the table, spotting Mikasa seated right next Jean.

He could already feel a plan forming in his head.

“I guess I should go and apologize,” he mused.

Connie simply shrugged. “It’s your funeral.”

Levi turned back towards him with a calculated smile, one that made the boy instantly take a step back. “We will see about that.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Seems like you’re having fun,” Levi noted, allowing his gaze to wander about his more or less sobered up soldiers.

Suddenly all eyes turned towards him and he could immediately see the realization spark inside Mikasa.

This was going to be fun.

“Captain!” Sasha called enthusiastically, “here, sit here!”

She kept patting the free spot on the bench next to her, right across Jean and Mikasa.

_Perfect._

“Thanks,” Levi noted.

Mikasa was already glaring daggers at him. He decided to rile things up a little.

“Mikasa,” he said, turning his attention directly towards the girl, “Armin told me that you haven’t really been acting like yourself.” He could see her eyes darkening. “Is there something I should be aware of?”

From the tension in her body, he could sense the attack coming even before feeling her leg shoot out under the table.

He was faster.

He quickly kicked her leg to the side, negating the attack and earning another glare of annoyance. She must’ve felt the sting of it too, because he made sure to bear down heavily on her ankle.

_Play stupid games, win stupid prizes._

He made sure to keep his expression unfazed.

“So?” he asked.

“Captain,” Jean interrupted, his laughter a bit a too nervous for someone having fun, “it might not be the best time to bring it up.”

“Keep your hands on the table where I can see them,” he ordered, voice calm and his tone even. “It’s not polite to make advances on intoxicated people.”

Ouch. That was dirty.

Jean was practically the dashing knight in shining armor when it came to romance. Levi was more than well-aware that he never would’ve tried anything… well, questionable, but the game has already started and Jean-bo was still in the way.

Predictably, Jean quickly threw his hands into the hair, blushing heavily. “What’s going on with you?!” he asked, fuming.

“I wonder,” was his only answer. “Something seems to be in the air tonight.”

“It’s the booze, Captain,” Sasha tried whispering to him but she wasn’t self-aware enough to actually keep her voice down. “It’s spiced.”

“Spiked,” Levi corrected.

“Spiked,” Sasha accepted. “Are you… you know… hungry?” she asked, leaning dangerously close to him and opening up her jacket, revealing a small piece of bread tucked inside her pocket.

“No, thank you,” Levi commented.

It was getting harder and harder not to laugh.

They were supposed to be adults.

That actually reminded him of something he needed done.

“Jean, bring Mikasa some water. She’s going to throw up.”

Jean’s eyes darted from the Captain to Mikasa, then right back to him. He quickly jumped to his feet, probably a bit too eager to leave the table for a while.

“I’m not,” Mikasa protested.

“I’m not taking your word on that,” Levi answered.

She was still laughably predictable.

He kicked her feet away again.

“And if you try that again, I will have to seriously reconsider your intentions.”

It took her only a moment to understand the meaning behind his words. She immediately started blushing.

Levi allowed himself a smile.

She wasn’t even tipsy. She knew exactly what he had meant and she could no longer use the “sorry, I was just a little bit drunk” argument to cover her ass.

“I can do whatever I want,” she hissed, stubborn as she was.

“Is that so?” he asked calmly. “What’s stopping you now?”

Her eyes were seething.

And no one else seemed to be aware.

This was a dangerous game to play.

He could see the telltale flinch of her shoulder as she adjusted her body weight, preparing to strike him again - but it never really came.

“Is that what you want?” she whispered, leaning closer over the table, sliding her leg carefully next to his.

He found the air escaping him. Fuck. He needed a moment to get his head back in the game. ”I heard you were more than ready to give me what I deserve.”

Things were getting quickly out of hand.

Where the hell was Jean? Or Armin, for that matter?

“I still haven’t decided,” she said, challenging him to hold her gaze or give up.

“Why not?” he asked and he could already feel her retreating.

He could’ve let it go. He could’ve left it at that. Everyone knew that they hadn’t really gotten off of the right foot. People wouldn’t have cared.

In truth, he had always found it hard to keep his hands off of her. It was strange, even more so because he wasn’t generally keen on touching people.

He slid his feet behind her heel, stopping her from breaking the contact.

“Don’t I get a chance to speak in my defense?”

He couldn’t quite tell what she had been thinking.

“You already did,” she whispered.

He could feel her legs moving again, one foot slowly riding up against his shin, stopping only for a moment before brushing past his knee.

She wasn’t wearing any shoes.

“So what’s the verdict?” he murmured, trying his damnedest to ignore the shortness of breath.

Suddenly, he spotted movement on the periphery of his vision. He needed to act quickly.

“Mikasa,” Jean called, “here’s the water. Sorry, things are getting bit wild out there.”

As soon as she heard her name called, she tried to quickly jerk her leg back. She tried, but she couldn’t.

Levi was faster.

Sliding his hand down, he quickly grabbed a hold of her ankle. The sight of her struggling desperately to regain balance was… gratifying.

“Thanks,” Mikasa whispered, licking her lips in embarrassment.

He could tell that the death glares would be coming later, but for now, everything was playing out all too sudden.

With a questioning look, Jean took his seat again right next to Mikasa. However, he had been so focused on searching her features for signs of distress that he had failed to notice that he should’ve been directing his gaze… much lower.

“I’m feeling better now,” she said, her voice surprisingly husky. She added a little cough to mask it, much to Levi’s entertainment.

“Are you sure, Mikasa?” he asked while he lifted a finger to gently circle over her ankle, careful not to break or loosen his hold too much. “Maybe you should take a little walk. Get some fresh air.”

Again, she was predictable.

She tried to jerk her leg back, this time with more force, but Levi was having none of it.

It was a futile attempt.

Her knee collided with the table, sending a few drinks flying.

Jean’s eyes grew wide.

“Sorry,” Mikasa apologized quickly, sliding lower on the bench. “Cramps.” She shot Levi a furious look. “The Captain had me jumping hoops all day.”

“That’s true,” he nodded. “I have indeed been working you too much,” he agreed, tilting his head a little to the side. “But you know the rules already: if you want to stop, you only need to ask.”

_If looks could kill_ , he thought.

“I don’t know what’s going on,” Jean murmured, “but at this point I am definitely too afraid to ask.”

With a smile, Levi finally let go of Mikasa’s leg.

She was quick to recover the hostage.

“It’s getting a bit late,” Levi noted, dusting his jacket before standing from the table.

He playfully patted Sasha’s head who was still sitting next to him, blissfully unaware and munching on the last morsels of her provisional bread.

“Please continue having fun… responsibly.”

He left the room with a smug sense of satisfaction that night.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Any sort of feedback is appreciated, feel free to share your thoughts if you'd like to! I'm still a bit behind with my replies but I promise to get back to everyone!

“Alright, everyone,” Hange exclaimed, eyes glimmering with childish excitement, “let’s get this started!”

Levi hated the crowded little lecture hall that the Scouts regularly used for coaching their recruits on contemporary strategies, improved equipment and newly approved missions.

At the moment, he had no idea what to expect, but as usual, he had taken his spot in the corner of the last row.

“Captain?” he heard someone whispering and he turned to see Connie and Sasha sliding onto the bench next of him.

“What?”

“Should we be taking notes?” the boy asked.

Levi simply grunted. His guess was as good as theirs.

Just before the doors closed, Levi spotted Mikasa making her way into the lecture room, pushing past a group of people and making a point to sit right next to him after politely asking Connie and Sasha to free some space for her.

The row had been full before and now it had become undoubtedly crowded, with hips and thighs pushing against each other.

It wasn’t anything new for Mikasa to be seated next to her Captain and other than Levi picking up on the peculiarity of the situation, no one else seemed to care or notice.

She fidgeted a little, making wriggle room for her knees and elbows. Levi, on the other hand, remained perfectly still, choosing to ignore the fact that he too could’ve moved at least an inch to the side.

She had a plan and he was curious to see it unfold but he wasn’t going to make it any easier on her.

From the corner of his eyes, he could see that her simple white shirt was loosely buttoned, her neckline plunging unusually deep without the presence of her tell-tale scarf. Freshly out of the shower, she smelled like lemongrass, the tip of her hair still dripping wet, occasionally sending small rivulets of water racing across her collarbone and the bare skin of her chest.

He refrained from rolling his eyes.

Now he was literally backed into a corner. For the next hour or so, he was now forced to ignore her scent and the teasing of her pert little tits making him think of things most unthinkable.

Well played.

He was drawn back from his daydreams once again by the ramblings of Hange. They were looking at him, expression somewhat expectant. Was he supposed to say something?

“I’m on it,” Mikasa called, brushing against his thigh as she stood. She pushed past him, making him silently curse as she turned her hips just so that he could enjoy a front row seat view of her shapely legs and humanity’s most magnificent ass.

Conclusion #1: she wasn’t ashamed of their earlier spat.

Conclusion #2: round two was just about to start.

Fuck.

She quickly pulled the drapes to cover the windows, making the sheen of light disappear from the blackboard. Hange thanked her and she was back on her way towards her spot.

He needed to make his mind up.

In for a penny, in for a pound.

He remained in his seat leaning back against the wall, arms crossed and legs stretched, giving no indication that he would be willing to move at all.

This time, she chose to face him on her way back, running her hand against the desk for support and providing him once again with a glorious view of her front, especially with the soft fabric of her shirt twisting and stretching as she struggled to navigate the small space between them.

He didn’t even pretend not to be staring at her breasts.

She promptly ignored him and Levi was quite alright with that.

One way or another, he was definitely going to enjoy himself.

* * *

It was the second time in the last ten minutes he had to slap her hand away.

Naturally, she made it look like an accident; it was simply just too crowded and she made a show of focusing on the lecture, jotting her notes on a spare piece of parchment she had borrowed earlier from Jean.

Both times, she had been rather slow to withdraw her wandering hand while mouthing ‘sorry’ in the most unfazed way possible.

He knew she wasn’t.

The next time she did it, he wouldn’t reach down to stop. He wanted to see how far she was willing to go before eventually chickening out. And he was quite convinced that she would, considering how quickly she had lost her bravado in their last tug-of-war.

But now she was, of course, taking her time and the waiting kept him constantly on edge.

It was easy to make his body to cooperate, but his mind was a completely different matter.

Suddenly, he felt her fingers brush against him, her hand landing even higher on his thighs than before. She was a cheeky little brat.

Everyone was busy taking notes – or at least pretending to -, except him.

He leaned back, reaching over to her side and leisurely slipping a finger under the hem of her shirt, ghosting over the small of her back.

Eyes focused straight ahead, she squeezed lightly, tightening her hold on his leg and sending jolts of pleasure across his spine.

She was certainly good at teasing.

He reciprocated the gesture by brushing his thumb against the small of her back, making her instinctively arch back into his touch.

He must’ve caught her by surprise – or she was just simply too young to understand the workings of her body – because her expression darkened, as if she had just caught him cheating in the game that was never supposed to be played fair in the first place.

Still, it didn’t take her long to regain her composure.

She slid her hand higher on his thighs, her grasp gentle and feather-light as she stroked down the sensitive area dangerously close to the ‘here be dragons’ demarcation line.

That was certainly considerably bolder than he had expected her to go.

He was at a disadvantage, there was a limit to what he could get away with in a crowded room even under such a dim light.

She, on the other hand, had him at the perfect spot: no one else to sit behind or next to him and sitting in the corner definitely carried the advantage – or disadvantage – of being almost fully hidden by the shadows.

That, however, also meant that he could just let her do whatever she wanted.

The thought alone was enough to make him undone.

Until now, he had been careful to keep everything under control. Just a little fun, a bit of excitement, his pulse barely increasing.

 _Traitor_ , he cursed silently, glancing down at his body.

Maybe not being in control wasn’t so bad. After all, games aside, neither of them could’ve wished for getting caught feeling each other up. The thought, however, was certainly… thought provoking.

He held back a groan.

With her fingers still biting into the flesh of his upper thighs, she seized him tightly.

She must’ve found his strained expression rewarding enough, because she quickly loosened her grip and started lazily massaging the spot she had just assaulted.

In that moment, he gave a serious consideration to leaving – preferably with Mikasa in tow, so he could push her into the wall first thing outside the door and fuck her senseless.

At this point, it was hard to keep his thoughts even remotely coherent.

* * *

One full hour.

Almost sixty minutes of his torment.

His sanity was surviving only on fringes.

She had been at it throughout the whole lecture, getting touchy-feely but never actually moving past the point where the situation would be, without a doubt, indecent.

He had tried to leave at one point and she had the audacity to push him back on his seat before anyone around them could’ve noticed.

But even with the lecture nearing its end and people standing to leave, he was still backed into a corner. At least her hands were gone – something he never thought he would once be grateful for. The crowd was painfully slow to disperse. He allowed his head to fall forward, knocking right into the desk.

With the constant jabber around him, nobody seemed to notice.

* * *

“Captain, aren’t you coming?” Connie asked.

Levi’s head was still lying flat on the table.

“Hush,” he hard Mikasa answer. “He’s asleep. He must be tired.”

He heard the shuffling of feet and the room suddenly feel silent.

_He. Was. Going. To. Kill. Her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also: is there a good platform for joining the Rivamika convo? It's been a while since I've been active on tumblr and never in this fandom, but I'm not exactly itching to get back. Still, it would still be nice to chat with people so if it's actually a good place to start, please tell me!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated M for much sexual tension.
> 
> I am suffering from a major writer's block - I have started three different versions for this chapter and I ended up hating all of them, this one included. I will let you be the judge of things, as I am certainly incapable to like any of my own writing at the moment. Feedback, as always, is certainly appreciated (criticism included)!
> 
> Something you will immediately understand when you get there: as far as I know, it's entirely possible, although probably not for everyone. The definition is 'coregasm'.

This, whatever this was, needed to stop.

She had been on edge for days and people were starting to notice. The dark circles under her eyes, the tautness of her jaw and the stiffness in her posture; it was certainly hard to ignore.

And it was all _his_ fault.

He started it all.

People often teased Mikasa about the grudge she held for her Captain – a grudge she would’ve long forgotten about if people hadn’t pestered her because of it every chance they got. Yes, the Captain had made a show of beating Eren into submission and yes, Mikasa had been more than ready to fight him tooth and nail if needed.

But it had been, ultimately, the right choice and she needed to accept that.

She had wanted to hate him, she really had.

And it was impossible.

How could she hate the man who cared so much?

And the people, they all adored him. Idolized him, even. And for them, the only person who could stand against Humanity’s Strongest Soldier was none other than her, Mikasa Ackerman. They needed this fantasy to remind themselves that he too, was human.

And Mikasa had always found that strange.

Because how could anyone forget?

Still, neither Captain Levi nor Mikasa had ever been shy about speaking their minds, and the comfortable but candid routine they had eventually fallen in only served to fuel the pretence that a reckoning was still at hand.

As time passed, Mikasa had learned to see the merit in that: no matter how many times she had been caught with her gaze locked on him, the world forgotten, everyone seemed to know for certain that it was just rivalry rearing its ugly head up.

It had made things much easier for her, for him and for everyone.

_Ignorance is bliss._

And it was, until Levi had decided to break the familiar routine of convenient uncertainty and make it painfully certain that there was _something_ going on. The way he spoke that night, the gentle brush of his fingers on her skin turning into a firm, unrelenting grasp – it made her _feel_ things and _want_ things, and she could no longer ignore the memory of it haunting her mind.

Maybe it hadn’t been his intention, maybe it hadn’t been how he imagined things going after taunting her to speak up, but it was an invitation and Mikasa needed to decide what she wanted to do about that.

But the way it made her feel…

She wanted to make him feel just that.

And cornering him in the lecture hall had only been the start.

* * *

“Are you a soldier or a cowherd wallowing about?”

The question, of course, came from the Captain and Mikasa grimaced at the harshness of his tone. Refusing to turn her gaze toward him, she remained in the same position as she answered - lying flat on her back, arms crossed over her stomach.

“I am between sets, Captain.”

She could imagine his frown even without seeing it.

“Have been for a while now,” he commented, unrelenting.

Mikasa chose to ignore him.

These days, Levi was rarely if ever around, running errands and whatnot for the Commander, living practically half his life in the Capital. It’s been a while since she had seen him at all…

Mikasa should’ve known that his taunting was not without purpose and ignoring him would only cost her later on. She spotted him suddenly appearing on the periphery of her vision, seizing her up with his usual cold and calculated expression.

Before she could’ve protested, he positioned himself in front of her feet, locking her ankles in a firm and steady hold.

“Double your repetitions,” he ordered, unbothered by the resentful glare she had been sending in his direction.

“I would like to continue alone,” she replied, trying her best to keep her voice calm and even.

“Is that backtalk I’m hearing?”

She shouldn’t have forgotten that he most definitely was not above pulling rank just to annoy her.

“No, sir,” she growled, suddenly very much aware of the attention their conversation had garnered around the room. Which, on a second thought, wasn’t all that bad: regardless of his ostensible boldness, he practically had his hands tied with the rest of the team on and about.

Mikasa took a deep breath.

Sit-ups usually weren’t a cause for concern, not even with a training partner assigned. Still, the image of him being just a hair’s breadth from kneeling between her legs wasn’t exactly helpful in keeping her thoughts calm and her mind unoccupied.

With an effortless motion, she pushed herself from the ground.

She frowned. Something was not right, the position didn’t feel right. She tried shuffling a little to the side, but the Captain’s grip stopped her from actually achieving much.

“What is it this time?” he asked, tone still unforgiving and detached.

“Sir,” she called, already knowing that she had probably given him the perfect ammunition for another verbal attack, “I need to adjust my position.”

“Where do you think you are? Dancing lessons? Keep going,” he commanded.

Mikasa murmured a quiet _fuck you_ under her breath.

“What was that?” he asked, suddenly sounding a lot more agreeable, the lightness in his tone easy to mistake for curiosity.

As if he didn’t know.

And she definitely knew better.

“Yes sir,” she replied, loud enough for the rest of the room to hear.

“From the start, then.”

_Wonderful_. She chose not to inquire whether he meant the current set or the entirety of it all.

With her knees still far too close for comfort, she started counting from one. At least this way she could ignore his insufferably cold expression as long as she kept her eyes on the appropriate spot. She would definitely not allow him to get to her through something as blatant as regular issue sit-ups. He would have to work harder if he wanted to get under her skin this time.

But it was still just… not quite right. No matter how hard she tried to ignore the friction inside her body, it just became more and more pronounced, steadily building up to something impossible to ignore. It took her a while to recognize the feeling – and the realization gave her a momentary pause and considerable blush.

Vaguely, Mikasa heard the Captain call out to her, probably berating her for lagging behind, but truth to be told, none of his words were able to get traction in her mind.

She chanced a glance at him, curious to see how much he had noticed or how fast he might’ve been catching on, but the frown he sported only seemed to indicate a miniscule amount of confusion mixed with a fair share of frustration.

He hadn’t the slightest clue – and that made her excitement all the more palpable. Still, he must’ve noticed that something was off.

Mikasa needed to make up her mind quickly. If she continued pushing and stretching her body like that, the tension building up inside her was bound to reach a breaking point. If she kept going, she was, without a doubt, going to come.

And he wouldn’t even have to notice – or better, he wouldn’t even have to know that she had just brought herself to completion right under his nose.

After the initial shock and embarrassment wore of, she felt excitement washing over her.

She could do it.

It would be a tiny little secret.

It wouldn’t bother anyone – she could be quiet, just the way she usually was.

It wasn’t a big deal – why would it be?

So she kept going, one repetition after another, never taking her eyes off of him. There was something in the way he looked at her that made her enjoy this little game even more.

He knew something was off, that much she could tell from the furrowing of his brow. He might’ve noticed the intensity of her gaze or the newfound determination in her movements, but he couldn’t have known the reason behind any of it – and this was more stimulating than anything she could’ve imagined.

She could feel her body nearing the edge, her chest heaving and her breaths now coming in short puffs as she made no effort to stop or even pause.

She heard him call her name.

Was this a dream? She wasn't entirely certain.

It all washed over her unexpectedly and the feeling was… overwhelming.

Her thoughts crumbled into an undecipherable mess as she threw herself on the ground, instinctively trying to curl up to silence the trembling of her body. She had to bite down hard on her lip to keep her emotions manifesting in the form of sounds.

For a while, she had completely lost track of time.

For a moment or two, the world stopped existing.

* * *

What the hell was she up to this time?

When he had walked over to her, he hadn’t expected anything to go wrong – there had been no reason to. This was, after all, just freeform exercise.

He had always enjoyed ordering her around, that much was true, as it both entertained and excited him in equal parts. He enjoyed seeing the fire of defiance in her eyes, he loved making her so frustrated that she could barely keep herself from telling him to go fuck himself, rank and decorum be damned. It was, after all, something he had been doing for a while.

He had been planning to taunt her just like he had numerous times before, stoking the tension until it grew dangerously close to her breaking point.

He had been planning to tire her out completely, only to leave her vexed with all her unresolved frustrations.

But something wasn’t quite right.

He watched with intent as her eyes grew darker, her fire now bright and blazing. He could feel his pulse quickening at the sight of her, although he couldn’t fully understand why. Yes, he wanted her - it was old news, but after all this time, an innocent little exchange like this shouldn’t have made him doubt his self-control.

So why did the look she gave him make him feel so heavy with need and want?

Something was wrong and he couldn’t quite figure out what.

He watched her gaze suddenly lose focus and he called out to her, afraid that she had been losing consciousness struggling against his grasp. He wanted to tell her that she could stop, that she didn’t need to push on if something was indeed wrong, but he didn’t get to do that.

He watched helplessly as her head lolled back, body collapsing to the ground and feet kicking out, his kneecap suffering the brunt of the impact.

And it was only then that he noticed something else.

Could a person even do that? How? Why?

He found himself at a loss of words. He watched her coming down from a high he didn’t even notice her climbing towards.

“Mikasa?” he heard someone call and he quickly snapped his head towards the source, now suddenly very much aware of the privacy they both lacked.

“Muscle cramps,” he stated, struggling extremely hard to keep his voice even. “You are dismissed.”

“But Captain…”

Levi’s attention had been so tied up that he couldn’t even tell which of the impertinent brats had chosen to argue.

“What was that? Don’t you have anything else to do? Cleaning duty it is, then,” he bit and they quickly scurried off, mumbling something about reports and chores and whatnot.

He couldn’t have cared less.

When he turned his eyes back towards her, he found her looking at him as if she had just woken from a dream.

He called out to her, gently, and she quickly raised a hand to cover her eyes, probably to shield herself in embarrassment.

Just how the hell was he supposed to deal with that?!


	5. Chapter 5

“This is ridiculous,” Mikasa thought as she walked through the hallways soaking wet, drenched boots in hand. She could feel the fabric of her shirt sticking to her body like a second skin; stifling and freezing in the chilly autumn weather - decidedly awkward and uncomfortable.

She could tell that there was someone ahead of her just around the corner, but the echoes reverberating through the mossy stone walls and the squelching sounds of her steps made it hard to recognize the voices engaged in hushed conversation, now suddenly falling silent.

She took a deep breath and straightened her posture, fully prepared to walk by as if nothing had happened.

“Commander,” Mikasa called with a salute, trying to hide her expression of utter disappointment as her gaze fell on two awfully familiar figures after rounding the corner. “Captain,” she added out of politeness but made no effort to meet the eyes of her commanding officer.

Hange’s mouth fell open. “Mikasa?!”

Mikasa watched the Commander run to the nearest window, eyes surveying the clouds first before sweeping the grounds below them. “That must’ve been quite the drencher,” Hange mused.

“That’s not it,” Mikasa commented, trying to stifle the resigned sigh threatening to escape her. She wanted to keep things curt and professional. “Two of the new recruits required assistance after falling into the lake.”

The Commander gave her a confused look.

“Gear included,” Mikasa added, now with a sigh. “All equipment – mine included – has been returned for maintenance and a report has been filed by the engineering crew.”

Hange simply nodded. “Well, that’s unfortunate. Any casualties?”

Mikasa shook her head. “Both soldiers remain unharmed, albeit a bit scared.”

Once again, Hange nodded. “That’s reasonable, I guess. Suffocation is a slow and ugly death,” she mused, tone a bit too jovial for a subject so dark and melancholic, “I’m sure it was terrifying.”

“I think they’re more afraid of the punishment Jean is going to dash out on them on account of reckless behaviour and the endangering of others,” she noted. “After all, he had learned from the best,” she added, voice almost a whisper. From the corner of her eyes, she tried gauging Levi’s reaction, but he seemed decidedly untouched.

“Alright then,” Hange concluded, dismissing Mikasa with a sympathetic look.

Finally, she thought as she raised her arm for salutation, trying to ignore how comical she might’ve looked with her hair flat and boots still drenched with water.

Then, as usual, the Commander seemed to have suddenly remembered something. With a sharp turn, she ran back to Mikasa from her previous position by the window, excitedly exclaiming a strain of absent-minded thoughts, something that Mikasa was far too jaded to comprehend

She raised her eyes towards the Captain, the look on her face probably more dismayed than she would’ve liked to admit.

“She wants the leeches,” Levi explained with a shrug, seemingly unfazed by the whole ordeal.

“The leeches?” Mikasa asked, her voice becoming more desperate.

“The leeches. If you find any of them latched onto you, she’d like to have them for research purposes.”

Mikasa swallowed hard. Really? Wasn’t she in enough of a predicament already?

“I see,” she nodded, throat suddenly feeling unusually dry. “I… uh… I will,” she stammered, unsure of how she was supposed to react. “Am I dismissed, then?” she asked, no longer bothering to hide the hopefulness in her tone.

Hange was just about to nod, but Levi interrupted. “Not so fast,” he commanded, grabbing Mikasa by the arm. “There are a few things we need to discuss.”

“Can it wait?” Her gaze was decidedly sharp enough to let him know that any insistence on his part would be most unwelcome.

“No,” he stated, ignoring her silent protest. “I will escort you to your quarters.”

His grip on her arm was firm but not forceful – she could’ve broken it with little effort. She quickly glanced toward the Commander who seemed to be eyeing their exchange with a curious glimmer in her eyes.

Mikasa finally gave in. “As you wish, Captain.”

This was going to be a long walk.

* * *

Regardless of saying that he –they – had things to discuss, the Captain remained silent until they reached the door to the small room she had come to share with Sasha.

Still, he couldn’t be bothered to remove his arm from her person, making it look as if he had been the one guiding her across the hallways and corridors. He used his free hand to open the door for her and wave her in – but Mikasa didn’t really have time to reprimand him for acting so brazen like that.

She finally shook her arm free and walked into the room, not even bothering to ask whether he would coming inside. He certainly didn’t need her permission for hat.

She only turned to face him once she heard the tell-tale click of the lock behind her.

“Are you planning to watch me undress?”

She had promised herself that she would not back down, that she would challenge him on every front she could. The thought made her blush and she could feel her heartbeat quicken, but she said the words regardless, keeping her gaze locked on him as he took one, two steps closer.

“No,” he stated, tone calm and matter-of-fact. “Not that I would mind,” he added, his voice now somewhat pensive, “but I think you will need my help more than you will not.” Hooking two fingers under the straps of her harness, he tugged heavily, forcing Mikasa to stumble closer to him and gasp in surprise. “Knowing how impatient you are, you will probably break a nail or two before you get these off.”

He sounded calm and deliberate, and it wasn’t fair.

But she allowed him to run his hands over her bindings regardless.

* * *

When he had spotted her outside in the hallway, for a moment, he couldn’t believe that she could ever be made to look so miserable.

Now that he had her standing completely still, he could feel her shiver under his touch.

No matter how much he would have liked to enjoy the situation, he needed to hurry up.

“Turn around,” he instructed, working his way through her equipment with deft fingers. The leather was wet now and hard to manage, but it would only get worse as it dried out and hardened.

“Are there…” she asked, her voice almost failing her, “are there really leeches?”

Was she scared? He found the thought, well, for a lack of better world… adorable.

“How should I know?” he replied nonchalantly, grabbing her by the shoulder and spinning her around her heel so she would come to face him again. “Lean on my shoulder,” he told her as he gently nudged her knee with his own, prompting her to raise her leg, allowing him to finally rid her of the remainders of the harness.

“I need you to check,” she stated, sounding much more confident this time.

He needed to think for a moment. Holding onto her like that had been already doing things to his head.

He gave in.

“Take it off,” he nodded, finally letting go of her leg and taking a step back.

He expected her to turn around, to cling to modesty even in a situation like that.

But she didn’t.

Instead of turning away, she took her sweet time to unbutton her shirt, slowly revealing her collarbones and the tight bindings covering her chest, shedding her clothing at the slowest pace possible.

“Raise your arms,” he instructed and silently cursed to himself, because finding his commanding voice was really damn hard.

Could he even touch her like that?

There was only one way to find out.

He ran his hands against her sides, and this time, he made sure to go extremely slow, his fingers counting every rib they touched. “Nothing here”, he mused.

Instead of telling her to turn around, he was the one to move first, keeping one hand in place as he walked. He could already see the muscles on her back relaxing as she started lowering her arms.

“Don’t slack off,” he lectured, brushing her hair out of the way to get a better view of the crook of her neck. “Don’t you want get rid of the little bastards?”

As if there had been any to begin with.

Her shoulders trembled a little and she quickly covered her mouth. Was she laughing now?

He ran a finger across her spine and watched her quiver under his touch. “You need a hot bath,” he stated, steeling his resolve.

“Are you sure you’re done?”

What sort of question was that? The sudden knock on the door interrupted the thought.

“Seems like it,” he said, leaning closer to her, so close that she could probably feel his breath as he whispered against her skin.

Maybe it was for the best.

But still… who was he kidding?


	6. Chapter 6

The room was cold and smelled faintly of mildew. There was little space left for Mikasa to lay down her bedroll but she was already used to having to make do with uncomfortable sleeping arrangements. Her friends had already situated themselves under the thin military-issue blankets, probably hoping to fall asleep as soon as possible to fend off hunger and peacefully sleep through the freezing downpour.

Luck truly hadn’t been on her side these days and having a bucketful of rainwater soak her to the bones wasn’t among the things she had planned. Her hair still felt damp against her skin, no matter how much time she had spent trying to dry it off. While she was thankful to the farmers who had agreed to provide them with lodging for the night, she really would’ve appreciated at least a few logs of firewood smouldering in the hearth.

Truth to be told, she had hoped that Sasha would seek her out to snuggle under the blanket, like she usually did at times like this, but it seemed like Mikasa was irrevocably late to the party: she spotted the girl huddled close to Connie, her nose buried in the crook of the boy’s neck. Begrudgingly accepting defeat, Mikasa started unpacking her bag, placing her bedroll right under the window and basically, again, the coldest place possible in the whole room.

“First come, first served,” she grumbled, keeping her voice low.

No one seemed to notice her presence – or at least react to her arrival. Were they all fast asleep? Or were they all trying to get there the fastest before Armin started talking in his sleep or Jean decided to go on a midnight stroll?

With a sigh, Mikasa glanced towards the person closest to her, trying to gauge whether it would be talking, snoring or a good kick to her kidneys the night had in store for her.

At this point, she shouldn’t even have been surprised.

“Captain,” she whispered before covering her body with the blanket, fighting off the urge to sigh.

“Took your sweet time,” he mused, keeping his voice low.

She simply shrugged. Changing out of her soaked clothes _and_ washing up took time – but if someone, he should’ve known because it was him hogging the washbasin for a good quarter of an hour.

She considered turning her back to him to cut the conversation short, but decided against it. Was he still up because he simply couldn’t sleep in a rickety old shack like that, or had he been waiting for her to arrive?

“I’m cold,” she ended up whispering, truly against her better judgement.

“And?”

Like usual, he seemed so impossibly calm that Mikasa wanted to kick him in the shins just to see him actually react.

“I can’t get to Sasha because you are in the way.”

“So?”

So they were back at square one.

Mikasa bit down on her lower lip. He had certainly made himself available. Why else wait for her and bother striking a conversation at the same time if not to let her knew that he was, well… game?

But was she?

These last few weeks had been an impossible battle of tug-of-war and she enjoyed every moment of it. He never said what he truly wanted from her and neither did she. She had always found him attractive – and not just physically, but still, she had other things to worry about and so did he. Besides, he had been so damn careful to maintain his distance that Mikasa never really thought that he could be interested in her. And even after dancing around each other for weeks, he wouldn’t make the first move.

Should she try provoking him to see how far she could get?

Or should she just go ahead and tell him what she wanted?

And on that front… Did she have any idea at all? At this point, he would probably figure it out sooner than she did… And the thought made her blush.

“So you have to keep me warm,” she murmured, trying to hide the tell-tale signs of embarrassment washing over her.

He regarded her for a long moment, making her doubt whether she might have misread whatever it was he had intended.

“Turn around,” he instructed and she found herself blinking in surprise, utterly confused.

He must’ve decided that doing was better than talking, because he quickly reached over, grabbing Mikasa by the hips and jerking her towards him, pulling her from under the blanket and covering her with his own.

“Turn around,” he told her again, this time, his voice barely a whisper.

She nodded, still a bit uncertain, but did as he asked. Turning her back to him, she allowed his hands to guide her in aligning her body against his, the curve of her ass now resting comfortably – and conveniently - in his lap.

She certainly wasn’t feeling cold any more.

His hand brushed against her, tracing a path from her thighs up to her hips, then along her side, lingering just a moment above her waist.

“How far do you want me to go?”

She hadn’t the slightest clue. She certainly had no quarrel against him putting his hands on her…

Still, even if she tried to ignore the tingling sensation his proposal had elicited somewhere deep inside her – which would have been impossible, she could tell – their surroundings were… well, far from ideal to delve into things much more private.

Even so, the thought of giving him free reign excited her.

What if she just told him to do whatever he wanted to? He would probably tease her like he had – and she had – before, pushing and pulling to see how far she would truly allow him to go before leaving her hanging, head dizzy and craving for more.

While she hesitated with her answer, his hands grew bolder, slipping under her shirt and setting out to explore. She almost kicked out in surprise when his hand cupped her breast. “If you wake them,” he murmured, voice breathy and his lips brushing dangerously close to her ear, “the party’s over.”

She nodded, not trusting her voice.

She only noticed in that moment that he had been still holding onto her when his fingers started kneading her flesh, his thumb brushing against sensitive skin as he leaned in to kiss her neck.

Arching instinctively into him, she found it near impossible to remain silent. She too could feel him under the coarse fabric of their uniform but he was quick to slap her hand away when she tried to reach over. “Not this time,” he growled, grabbing her wrist and prompting her to cover her mouth instead before returning his hand – and his undivided attention – the her breasts.

She really did need that hand to keep herself quiet. She could feel her body wanting more and she tried rubbing her thighs together to ease at least some of the tension.

“Not this time either,” she heard him whisper, quickly readjusting her other hand that slowly started to wander.

Clearly, she wasn’t allowed to touch _anyone_.

But it didn’t really matter, because she could barely keep her thoughts coherent. Just how long was he planning to keep it up?

She felt she already knew the answer.

* * *

She had no idea how much time had passed. His hands never parted long from her breasts, letting the sensation inside her build in torturous silence until she could no longer keep it bottled.

Mikasa knew where babies came from – and she was aware that the process, if done right, could be considered _extremely_ pleasurable but she never suspected that having her poor, unassuming nipples teased into oblivion could also send her over the edge.

This was certainly, definitely and decidedly not fair.

Still, she was way too worn out to tell him to go fuck himself and his deft little fingers. He even had the gall the sneak a few more feather-light kisses onto the crook of her neck as lay there panting, still too wound up to think of anything that actually made sense.

“Payback is a bitch,” she heard him whisper, brushing his lips slowly against her ear.

That, she could wholeheartedly agree with.


End file.
